he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize