Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
