I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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