I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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