nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
