My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
did you just send me my own nude
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
