Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
