Rock
Scissors
Fuck
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Randomize
