how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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