i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
