i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
