I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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