I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I enjoy the company of your penis
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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