And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
