I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize