He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
