I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
