I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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