end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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