The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize