if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
