I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
i think i have two assholes
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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