hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Dicks are not precious.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
