Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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