so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
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