Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize