apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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