of course. lets lasso hookers.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
