Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
There r osticjed everywhere
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Randomize