sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
