i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
You took a bar mat shot.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
