doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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