Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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