His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
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