Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
