The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Randomize
