I hate all girls vehemently.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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