He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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