You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
