Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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