So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
