white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
