I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
