nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
