watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
