On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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