there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
