Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
worst night to have a conscience
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
