I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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