operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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