Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
